Quotes

Quotes from some of my fav birds

no security allowed, jump off the edge and reinvent yourself every few years. take chances and have a series of dumb relationships.--Laurie Cortright

Society is now one polished horde,
Formed of two mighty tribes, the Bores and Bored.
--Lord Byron

Just bludgeon them with your rapier wit.
--Mike Wilchek to Ariana

Getting religion is like getting herpes. Its a highly infectious disease that leaves you in constant fear of pain and burning. And you keep trying to give it to others.
--Darren Schnider

I saw some of the greatest minds of my time
turned to silverfish crap in bookstores. Thank God for booze.
--Michael Eldritch

The Arts are what make us Human.
--Dona Black

You can't let things like that bother you. If people want to crash themselves on the rocks that surround you, that's their business. It's a lonely life, but singing often helps past the time.
--Carla "the Siren" Osborne

I'm cool but I'm not smart. Don't confuse the two.
--Joan Jones

Most people are other people. Their thoughts are someone else's opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation.
--Oscar Wilde

Bowling has got to be about the revolution; you got a big black ball
knocking over a buncha skinny white pins with red necks.
--Jimmy Flame

Let us endeavor so to live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.
--Mark Twain

For an instant our lives met,
Our souls flowered.
--Oscar Wilde

Hell will have flat beer. And everyone will have the genitalia of a Barbie Doll.
--Reverend Ana Obermayr

If I don't drive around the park,
I'm pretty sure to make my mark.
If I'm in bed each night by ten,
I may get back my looks again.
If I abstain from fun and such,
I'll probably amount to much:
But I shall stay the way I am,
Because I do not give a damn.
--Dorothy Parker

When you see enormous cockroaches driving Dodge Darts, then you'll know the Apocalypse is here.
--Mike Marshall

Before enlightenment, chop wood, carry water.
After enlightenment, buy pizza, drink beer.
--Krystal Locke

You know, you only find what you are looking for, really, if the truth be know.
--Mary Leakey

It's only theatre: tiny, intense, vital and unimportant. It is a joke with cosmic consequences.
--H.L. Mencken

My love runs by like a day in June,
And he makes no friends of sorrows.
He'll tread his galloping rigadoon
In the pathway or the morrows.
He'll live his days where sunbeams start
Nor could storm or wind uproot him.
My own dear, love, he is all my heart--
And I wish somebody'd shoot him.
--Dorothy Parker

Sometimes a scream is better than a thesis.
--Ralph Waldo Emerson

The Sign of a Professional is to be able to do it on demand. . .That's not what I meant.
--George Roberts

May the sweet lust of a thousand gorgeous boys worship your bed.
--Tracy Thomas

The best audience is intelligent, well educated, and little drunk. --Alben Barkley

Can't talk. Coming down.
--Lisa Simpson

He has the gift of seeing the obvious in the miraculous.
--Krystal Locke

It's kinda like the humming bird. She moves so fast she no longer appears to be moving.
--Terrence Connelly

My life has a superb cast but I can't figure out the plot.
--Ashleigh Brilliant

To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting.
-- e.e. cummings

Mediocrity knows nothing higher than itself; but talent instantly recognizes genius.
--Arthur Conan Doyle

Two paths in the woods, and I took them both.
I want it all.
--Tim Waterman

I believe in compulsory cannibalism. If people were forced to eat what they killed, there would be no more wars.
--Abby Hoffman

More capacious then an elephant's scrotum and just as difficult to get your hands on.
--Black Adder

There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. . .There is another theory which states that this has already happened.
--Douglas Adams

It's hard to run the bases when the grass is waving at you.
--David Nystrom

Ah, youth. Ah, statute of limitations.
--John Waters

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
--Benjamin Franklin

You need only reflect that one of the best ways to get yourself a reputation as a dangerous citizen these days is to go about repeating the very phrases which our founding fathers used in their struggle for independence.
--Charles A. Beard

Everyone complains about his memory but no one complains about his judgment.
--La Rochefoucauld

Lead the simpler, the luxurious, the sensuous, the strenuous, the intellectual lives till you have as many, or nearly as many, lives as a cat.
--Katherine Routledges

Oh no, what horror, what new plot, what new agony is this?
--Aeschylus

What fresh hell is this?
--Dorothy Parker

Battle not the monster, lest you become a monster.
Gaze into the Abyss and the Abyss gazes into you.
--Nietzche