This
hidden cabal labored covertly to guarantee the survival of nudist
aliens via studies in Wildlife Relocation, specifically through
reintroducing Hellcats to the Palouse, a
carnivore whose population had been drastically depleted over the
years.
It was
unusual to select Steph (Stephicus Obfuscatus Felidae) for the study
as this particular type of cat is difficult to track due to its
great speed -- rivaling that of the cheetah -- and
stealth.
Is Your Roommate a
Steph?
Signs to Watch
For
1. Rarely seen roomie (i.e., the Invisible
Roomate Syndrome)
2. Clutter wake
3. Poltergeist like activities.
Clunking noises in rooms that no one is
in.
4. Cats (Felis Catus)
wailing.
5. Spontaneous parties populated entirely
by party crashers and conspicuously lacking in a host or a
guest list.
6. Playing with found objects (often
confused with juggling)
If you answer
"Yes" to one of more of these questions you may have a
Stephicus for a
roommate.
Sightings:
A.
Steph Sign- Numerous sighting has been reported but none have
been substantiated due to the lack of sufficient empirical
evidence to support these claims.
No
photos are available
Hints for the
Amateur Stephicus
Hunter
Habitat: The Feral Steph
often makes her lair in subterranean
locations.
Due to her alien physiology,
she absorbs nutrients through radiation from video display
terminals, computer monitors and TV screens being most
common. This is usually performed under the pretext of
checking e-mail or watching Xena:
Warrior-Princess.
All this is of course
speculative as Steph sighting are rare, and based on the oral
testimony of hermitic farmers, drunken louts, and media hungry
gadabouts, and scant trace evidence found at the
scene.
Do
not approach Stephicus. She has been known to pounce
without warning. Avoid sudden movement as this will set Stephicus into motion.
You have been
Warned!
